[x]

RelapseIt’s like counting
Saturn’s rings,
hash marks
along your limbs -
remembering a time
when

‘just one more’

made you feel better.

- & you’re sitting there
wondering why
Draco, stuck in limbo
always looks like he’s

falling.

Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
Maybe.
But at least it makes me
Me.

UneditedWe cry.
We scream.
We fight for our dream.

We scream.
We cry.
We're just waiting to die.

The same emotions
with a different drive.
Sometimes dead, sometimes alive.

The same in one way,
different in another
brother and sister, sister and brother.

So close in feeling,
so different in the end.
Falling apart, or finally on the mend?

Which am I?
Will I ever know?
Fighting to stay or ready to go?

Maybe I'm both,
in some impossible way.
Emotions oddly mixed everyday.

Wouldn't surprise.
I'm such a freak.
Excuse me, I laugh, I should call it "unique"

WorthlessWorthless,
the name that cuts like a knife,
Me,
it's all that you see inside,
My heart,
is breaking with every breath I take
The lies,
the only thing I can't seem to face.

Battle in my MindEat.
Don't eat.
Take it easy.
Work out until you pass out.
Get help.Tell someone.
Keep it a secret. It's only for you and me.
You're perfect.
You're worthless.
You're beautiful.
You're disgusting.
Why won't you listen?
They don't understand.
Let me help you.
You don't understand.
Show me.
No!
I love you..

In The Daylight

In The Daylight

A false downfall
An unexpected revival

Sunset to moonset
Shining through darkness

Life...redefined
Death...redesigned

In the valley of promises- I will fear no end
On the brink of weakness- I will ascend
-
Roads of the toughest
Paths of the darkest

I conditioned my flawed limits
So fearful memories won't be paralytic

I had to raise my own spirit
Strength and endurance become so vivid

A chance for change / A moment of fate
A time to make peace / A brief feeling of creed
A sealing of my slate / A silencing of my mistakes
A secret ready to be freed / A chain soon-to-be incomplete

Pain and peace are infinite
Judge the wrat

wallflower clippingsthere's scar tissue in her throat,
swollen around the words she never said;
dark rings around her eyes
like planets unremembered, and
a staleness to her touch,
the crystalline Dead Sea.

she's living like a story
that's already been told
"if no one loved you
would you mean anything at all?"

in that moment,
we forget to exist.

We are the King and Queen of Broken DreamsStanding still in a mine field, staring at all we have left.
We were so young, we didn’t stop to think.
Now we’re in a car crash, teetering on the brink.
If you were to leave me now, I don’t know what I’d do.

It was a whirl wind romance,
A light when all was black, a spark of something when all was bleak.
You swept me off my feet and made me feel brand new.
I thought we could live forever and I’m certain you did to.

We built a house without foundations
And now we’re falling down,
Everything’s crumbling around us, time slipping through out fingertips.
People used to walk past us but they were to drunk to see,
That our lives are coming apart around us, there is no light as far as we can see.

There was no fire to start with,
Just two broken things, the world had left behind.
The casualties of other people’s dreams of power, money and control,
Spat out onto the curb to rot away and die.
We never stood a chance or so

Our MasksThe masks we wear are perfect
Never loose and rarely tight
They keep us safe from others
And keep our demons out of sight

They smile when we are broken
And laugh when we simply must
No blemish or imperfection
A creation that will never rust.

I seldom ever remember
Who I am without my mask
That to peel off that layer
Is such a daunting task

All others carry one as well
Wherever they may go
And no matter what is on their minds
Only the molded mask will show.

The lies they preach in public
Or the scars along their wrists
Are left mute to others knowledge
Ignorance is such a splendid gift

My mask is oh so perfect
Not a crack will show
Alway

LonelyLonely.
Unnoticed.
People don't even look
when they walk by.
Always ignored...
Nobody even asks my ideas,
my opinion.
Nobody even knows
who I am.
When people see me,
they either ignore me,
or ask a question:
"Who are you?"
But they don't even bother
to listen to my response:
"I'm Canada."
Forgotton.
Forgotton by everyone.
Forgotton by my friends, my allies.
Maybe one day
Someone will remember my name.
Canada.

Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.

But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.

That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.

But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.

No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.

So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.

Falling off the EdgeDo you know what it feels like?
To nearly fall off the edge,
but not quite...
just so that you're dangling;
clinging for your worthless life
lest it fall into the sea of loneliness.
Your callused, pink fingers turning
to a shade of purplish-red of pain
as it does it best to hold on.

Splash.

In the sea of loneliness,
everything is crisp, translucent.
There is nothing around you,
you are alone...
unlike other people,
you have no one
clamouring to save you;
you have no one
diving in to get you out.

There is no point
screaming for help,
you will only waste
the little time and air you have left.
You only have the darkness
of the sea envelop

Honesty Written

from the

heart.

No eraser.

Ode to the boy with diamonds for eyesI think we were a collision course waiting to happen
And when I think back to the day when we first
Stumbled across one another, red sneakers hanging off gutters
Cherry cola voice overs and dilated pupils
We led one another on to believe in the night sky of connect the dot constellations

You wanted to dissect me and peer into the insides of my lungs
Only to find witches breath and dandelions
Slicing iron vowels you locked your hands in mine
And we fell into the static of dreaming disease
The operating table broke away to reveal a sky that never existed
And we couldn't help but laugh at the irony
Because wishing was never an option
The ane

PerfectEver had the feeling where you can't stop looking at a picture?
Your gorgeous face makes me smile
Go weak at the knees
Makes me giggle like a little girl

Those morning texts
All day conversations
Random silly things like that
Make me smile

I see the led light flash the colours I've set for when I get a message from you
My heart flutters
My cheeks flush
I go deaf to the world when I'm reading a message from you

If your down
I'm always there for you
I know you don't want to worry me
I know you want me to smile
But I'm always here for you
No matter how you feel
I'd prefer to help
Than for you to be down

Your gorgeous eyes
Are mesmerising
You

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Love, Hate, and YouLove, Hate, and You

Now I like being your friend
And I'm not one to pretend
But your acting like a bitch again

So another worthless man said no
And you just go along with the flow
Doing the only thing you know

Cry, cry, and cry.
Then you come to me with teary eyes
And all I can do is sigh.

Why do you like shitty guys?
I really don't understand why
And I don't want another lie!

Because I really care about you
And you know it's true
But you act like you don't have a clue

And I get so mad
Because your so sad
And I just want us to be glad.

But then again
I want to stay your friend
So I'll shut up in the end

So don't worry yo

Ribbions in her HairRibbions in her hair

Shoot a dream into my arm
Love creates only harm
I will close my eyes
And I will not cry
As I drift out into open space
I'll forget about this place
But I can't forget that girls face.

She had ribbions in her hair
She was always there
She was never there
She had ribbions in her hair

Shoot a dream into my brain
Loves swirls down the drain
I will swallow my tears
And embrace my fears
Loose yourself in brown snow
I really don't know
But why did she have to go

She had ribbions in her hair
She was always there
She was never there
She had ribbions in her hair

In my dream
I can hear her sceam
Blood on my

No one Loves meNo one Loves me

I kind of like your words
There all something I've heard
People been here before
But it can take more
If your going to come inside
Make sure your empty it on the outside

No one loves me
But thats fine with me
No one loves you
But its something I do

Oh man your such a bummer
Where did you get my number?
You want to got to dinner?
You say I'm a winner?
Hey are you a fool?
Don't you know my rule?

No one loves me
But thats fine with me
No one loves you
But it's something I do

Are you trying to be a star?
Why are you trying so hard?
I'm not a good girl
I've done things that'll make you hurl
But your still h

No more LiesNo more Lies

How long did it go on?
I didn't think I was wrong.
But it still shouldn't have last this long

I told them I wasn't single
Like a cheery comercial jingle
While this emptyness only tingled

Could they read past my smile?
I wonder about that for awhile
But my lies just pile and pile.

I told them I was dating you
Oh how I wish that was true!
But thats something you will never truly do.

But I didn't want them to know I'm alone
Because that place feels like home
So thats why they can't know about my heart shape dome

They can't know that I'm sad
Because then everything will turn bad
So I have to pretend to be glad.

But

Breaking DownBreaking Down

I'm going to break it down again
Because in the end
I'll show you I have nothing to defend

I kind of guess I'm a boy
I think my name is Troy
Can I be your toy?

Okay that was a lie
Maybe we should start off with a hi
But I should just say bye

Because I know this is a waste of time
But I got to pretend to be fine
Because I got love on my mind.

And if I ever want to find someone
I need to be fun
I need to be bright as the sun.

But I do have these sick dreams
That would make you scream
But it's not as it seems

Because I think I want a stalker
No I think I mean a talker
But what about about a walker?

Okay now t

Time to Move OnTime to Move On

Time is ticking away
Tomorrow will be another day
Feelings that will never go away

Logic says to move on
But I don't want you gone
Does love last this long?

How many days has it been since you talk to me?
I'm too blind to see
Because I wishing for what can be

Do you hate me that much?
When will I be enough?
Or will I just be part of your stuff?

I'll close my eyes
Because I rather not cry
I'll swallow my own lies

While you play your games
Everything is the same
This world is so lame

It doesn't matter what I do
Love isn't true
I'll never have you.

I act like your a possession
No wonder your my obssession

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Submitted: August 29, 2011
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I lied today

by *Alexisisinneed, Aug 29, 2011, 8:15:15 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I lied today

So I told a lie
I'm not really sure why
But I like it
Every last bit.

I talked about you
But I'm pretty sure you already knew
I talked about how you love me
If only that could be.

I said in september
Seventeen would be a date to remember
We would be together
Forever and ever

Foo Fighters would provide the fun
And we would become one
Expressing the feeling define by red
Twisting and turning in a bed

But your dead
So no matter what I said
It would never come true
Huh? That makes me a bit blue

And when I look inside
And all the feelings I chose to hide
Come bursting out
And all the lingering doubt

Fly away
And no matter what I say
And even though I love you
There's nothing I can do
Because your dead
I just can't get that in my head

I lied todayby *Alexisisinneed

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

...

~Sora-Girl-9 Sep 6, 2011 Student Writer

This is beautiful.

*Alexisisinneed Sep 7, 2011 Hobbyist Writer

Thank you. I'm glad you enjoy it.

~Sora-Girl-9 Sep 8, 2011 Student Writer

No problem. Me, too.

~Cecesays Aug 29, 2011 Student Digital Artist

I miss you.

*Alexisisinneed Aug 29, 2011 Hobbyist Writer

Oh why do you miss me?

~Cecesays Aug 29, 2011 Student Digital Artist

I miss you being nice to me. And texting me in the morning to wake me up.

*Alexisisinneed Aug 29, 2011 Hobbyist Writer

Thats why they invented the alarm clock, dear.

~Cecesays Aug 29, 2011 Student Digital Artist

But I prefer reading a text from you.

My phone wouldn't turn on today.

~ParanoidCynic Aug 29, 2011

Not painful emo poetry, flows well. Worth faving

*Alexisisinneed Aug 29, 2011 Hobbyist Writer

Yes painful emo poetry. Thanks for the fav.

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I lied today

I lied todayby *Alexisisinneed

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